I once knew someone who was addicted to shopping. She spent thousands of dollars on clothes, shoes, and jewelry on her daily shopping trips. When she maxed out her credit cards, she got new ones under different names. Her closets were full of new, unworn clothes with tags, and she still bought more. In those days she was called a ‘shopaholic’ someone who was addicted to shopping. What drove her behavior was a deep, driving need for attention, to feel special, loved, and valued. Any addiction is a powerful drive to engage in behaviors we do not understand or cannot control but it is the combination of an emotional need, together with the unresolved energetic pain of soul wounds, that creates an opening for addictive behavior.
I have always taught that Soul Wounds in the second energy center, the second chakra, create a potential for addictions and addictive behavior. This energy center controls our creativity and also determines how we value ourselves. When we have been marginalized, rejected, abandoned, or ignored by the people we count on to build our self esteem, such as parents and family members, an emotional black hole is created which we will use any means to fill. And if that emotional black hole begins in early childhood, by the time we are adults we are desperate to create ways to feel that we have a right to exist, to feel valued and to be validated, by turning our creative energy inwards to fill our aching need for emotional wholeness.
When our creative energy is hijacked to heal our own feelings of inferiority, our pain becomes a magnet for anything that we hope will help us feel better. So we try to end the pain by feeding it and that quickly devolves into an addiction because the pain is a bottomless pit that needs an energetic reset, not another meal.
Addicts are not only drug users, they are people who seek any kind of distraction from their pain and engage in a variety of behaviors like extreme sports, exercise, shopping, drinking, dieting, eating, work, pills, and more. The type of addiction doesn’t matter though because it is all directed towards the same goal – we want to feel whole, complete, pain-free, and happy. We are energetically incomplete and we need to fix the problem any way we can.
Soul wounds result from the energetic trauma we experience in this and in other lifetimes. They are created when we experience challenging life circumstances, like abandonment, betrayal, persecution, death, feel abandoned by God, and from things that happen to us and to loved ones that make us feel helpless and powerless, out of control and ineffective.
They have a strong pain energy signature that can dominate our reality so that everything we do is focused on relieving the pain, even for a brief moment. The deep longing for wholeness can compel us to create ‘false congruence’, where we try to fill in the joy gaps with anything that we think will relieve the pain. The problem with that is it doesn’t heal the pain so we need more of it to keep the gaps filled, this is what creates addictions.
Unless we understand that there is a source of this pain and can address that source first, any intention we have to heal ourselves will not work. It’s like committing to a diet and eating healthy food during the day, then binging on twinkies, chips, and soda at night. The real source of healing is to resolve the soul wound and heal the energy gaps and then we can release the addictions because we no longer need them.